Jul. 19th, 2016 08:56 pm
ameliar: (Default)
[personal profile] ameliar
Feeling really tired. It was a long day. Best day I've had at the company, so it's funny to think about tomorrow. I hope it's pretty good too. I think tomorrow is a cookout, so I won't need to bring a lunch. Although, their food is really not good at all, and I always feel like cattle when we're shuffled through the long lines for the free food. :/ meh.

It's difficult when I think about all the things I want to save up money for. It's sometimes hard to put it into order of which things I should save for first. I mean there are obvious things like save for emergency medical or emergency car repairs, but then there are other things like:

Moving expenses
House (someday)
Another Car

Anyway, things get really complicated when I throw in the factor of paying off loans and the massive chunk that I'm investing into my 5 yr graduate school plan. The idea is that with that grad certificate or degree and Sam's certificate or associates, we'll be able to double our earning potential and grow our finances like a tree. A money tree. We're planting a money tree with money seed.

When I think about grad school and my goal of working at google or some other inspiring place, I get really worried that I'll fail, but then I remember my career mantra. It's this:

Of course, I'm already privileged, but I don't know it's kinda funny that no matter how far up or down you are on the food chain, everyone's always trying to get somewhere greener. At this very moment, there's probably someone working at google making $$$$$$ and thinking "oh gee wouldn't it be great to do XYZ?" and that's life I guess.

I'm worried about Sam. Sometimes I think he's trying to do life alone or feels like he has to solve everything himself or be a loner or something. I try to tell him that I'm here for him. I hope he knows that I want to do life together. We're a family now. He shouldn't need to carry the world on his shoulders, I want to help. I guess what I mean is that all this worry about $$$, we'll solve it together. Careers? We'll make our way together. Education? We'll learn together. No one is the winner or loser. We're in this side by side.


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